Embarrassing!

My people! The tory wey I get for una today, no be small thing oh! In fact, wey I read the thing I no know whether to laugh or cry. Na so, I just dey mind my business one early evening wey my friend Chris come give me one kain unbelievable story! I swear, remain small I for rak the guy, but as I take my own eye see the thing, I no even fit talk again.

Our very own Goodluck Jonathan (bros, how na? I salute oh!) seems to think that the power situation in Nigeria is “embarrassing”. Why, you may ask….is it because millions of people all over Nigeria have to wear rumpled clothes to work every day? No. Is it because tailors and saw-mill owners all over the country have all lost their customers, gone bankrupt and are now no longer contributing to the economy? No. Is it because Doctors and nurses all over the country have lost patients in the middle of operations when power fails? No. What more then, you ask? Is there anything more embarrassing that all of the above mentioned? Yes, my people, it seems, believe it or not, there is.

According to our one and only Goodluck Jonathan, the fact, that there was power failure in the middle of a meeting (held at Sheraton international hotel) is very “embarrassing”. Embarrassing ke? You don’t say? Which country are you living in? Millions of people have been living with this so called “embarrassment” for as long as they were born. The younger generation (not all those ajebutter silverbird children oh! I know some of them are not even aware that there is something called “power failure”) are experts at when they will be light. Ask any young boy in Warri, with precise calculations, he will tell you if there is any need to “hope” for light on a certain day. It goes like this: “light? Today? Let me see…two weeks ago, on a Thursday we had light for two hours….wait…then last week, we had light for one hour….ehhhhh, we might, if they don’t give it to the other area…well, pray sha, maybe”.So my dear Jonathan(may I call you Johnny?), my dear Johnny boy, the word to use in this country when it comes to our light/electricity/power issues is not “embarrassing” or “upsetting” or “uncomfortable”, the word you should have used is TRAGEDY. Yes, that’s a very good word for what is happening in this country. I am tired of everybody sugarcoating our problems with nice little English words, let’s go wild here, why not DISASTER? It is only when the government sees the reality of the situation that they can ever hope to solve the problems.

P.S: To the Governor that refused to open a hospital for more than two years, because he was waiting for the president to come and “cut ribbon”. Shebi you see yaself now? Now, wey the people come vex anyhow, burn the thing go ground, una dey make noise? Una suppose don open that hospital long time ago even before dem paint am self, instead una dey wait make dem come cut ribbon!

Abeg, next time, if na to cut ribbon, no waste time, just call me sharp sharp, even if I no get scissors, I for use razorblade!

waffywaffarian@yahoo.com